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Sharing Circle

Bath time for our loved ones

1/29/2018

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There they sit -- in the corner, on the bed, in the chair.

Or even in the basement of your Albany-area home.

They never talk back, they always smile -- if that’s their nature -- and they don’t move until you move them.

They’re your “kids,” or your kids’ “kids,” although others might refer to them by a more conventional term -- stuffed animals.

But, just like your real children, they need to be clean. The reason? So that they don’t gather dust and spread bacteria that can cause health issues.

What is the best way to clean them, though, given the delicate nature of their fur? Or their battery cases?

There are four key ways to clean your stuffed animals -- in your washing machine, by hand, by dry washing, or by vacuuming.
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The highlights of those methods come from www.fabhow.com (for full details go to this link also):
  • Machine washing: While this approach can be rough on stuffed toys, there’s a simple step that can prevent damage to the toy -- just put it inside a mesh laundry bag and then wash it in the machine. Make sure you remove any attachments -- chains, crowns, slippers, etc. -- before washing the toys. Toys made with foam balls instead of regular cotton wadding, or those made with electronic equipment like a music box inside, should not be washed in the machine or with water. So after washing the non-electronic toy, remove it from the mesh bag and stretch it to restore its original shape. Clip it on a hanger and let it air-dry. Don’t put the toy in the dryer, because the heat can cause the glue and fur on the stuffed animal to melt.
  • Washing by hand: The simplest and gentlest way to clean stuffed animals and toys without damaging them is to do it by hand. Use liquid dish soap in a large bowl of water to disinfect and gently clean the outer surface; just remove all the attachments and wash the different pieces of attire separately. Make sure you don’t submerge into water any toys that have electronic parts, because doing so will not only damage the equipment but also might give you a nasty electric shock. Thus, with a non-electronic toy, rinse it with clean water, then wring out excess moisture and let the toy air-dry.
  • Dry washing: Baking soda is a great way to clean your furry toys. It absorbs oil and other impurities from the fur of the stuffed animals, leaving them clean with a pleasing fresh scent. For this method you’ll need plastic wrap in addition to the baking soda. First, stretch out a long piece of the wrap. Put the stuffed animal on top of it and cover it with a light coating of baking soda. Then wrap the stuffed toy completely in the plastic wrap and shake vigorously. Let it sit for 15 to 20 minutes; proceed to unwrap the stuffed animal and brush off the baking soda.
  • Vacuum: For a basic surface cleaning of your “kids,” use a vacuum cleaner with a small attachment. Just turn it on at a low setting.

After using one of these methods -- or more than one, depending on how many furry friends you have  -- you can give the stuffed animals back to your children, or to your significant other as a sparkling surprise on Valentine’s Day or any other special day.
After all, we all want clean kids, right?

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Preparing for the sleepover, Part 2

1/24/2018

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Now that you’ve gone through your checklist and decided that you and your child are ready to host a sleepover, what comes next?

Besides survival, of course.

How about a successful evening and next morning?

Parents, if you’re indeed prepared to entertain, feed, put to bed and wake up to your guests the next morning, you’ll need to figure out the following, per Parenting magazine:

  • Participants and arrival. One kid or several? And the earliest they should arrive is 5 p.m.
  • Select a date. Saturdays are considered the prime night for sleepovers, as young guests might have participated in tiring sporting events earlier in the day (thus promoting the possibility of actual sleep). However, also consider a Friday night: Challengers will be worn out from a full day of school (another aid to sleep) and will have both Saturday and Sunday to recover from the overnight event. Plus, church-going families might require their kids to attend religious services on Sunday morning — thus thwarting plans for later wake-up (yours and theirs).
  • Prep the home team: Warn other family members of the upcoming event and arm them well. Rent special movies for siblings or corral a close friend to take them on an outing for a portion of the big night.
  • The food. Less-than-healthy snacks are expected and encouraged at sleepovers. Offer easy-to-vacuum grub like popcorn, chips and pretzels. The next morning, rather than trying to win a chef’s contest, just stick to the quick stuff: cereal, muffins, bagels, frozen waffles, all served on paper plates.
  • The activities. As soon as the kids arrive, direct them to the ping-pong table or a craft project, etc. Save the main activities -- such as a movie or bowling -- for later, because someone inevitably will arrive after the party has started. And make sure you pace the fun.
  • Stay in designated areas. If you give kids the run of the house, you'll have much more to clean up the next day.
  • Homesickness: You can try to comfort the sufferer, but don't expect it to work. Experienced parents call the child's family right away. If you can hold down the fort, have your partner drive the child home; it takes less time than waiting for the other parents to get there, and the distressed child will feel reassured right away.
  • Bed-wetting. As a precaution, require all kids to use the bathroom before lights out. If the worst still occurs, help the victim maintain his/her dignity by feigning a tipped-over water bottle or soda can.
  • Get crucial info. Obtain cell and home phone numbers for every parent. Ask about guests' potential food allergies or other health issues. And get clear directions on how to use a guest's EpiPen if needed.
  • Check in regularly: Under the guise of "bringing more snacks," pop in every hour or so to be sure that 1) all guests are still present and 2) everyone generally is getting along.

No sleepover ever goes perfectly, but following the suggestions above will help you survive the night, and maybe even enjoy it -- somewhat, anyway.

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Preparing for the sleepover, Part 1

1/22/2018

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The sleepover.

With winter break from school coming up next month in the Albany area, you know your children are going to ask you at some point if they can spend the night at a friend’s house.

But parents, just how do you know when your children are ready for one of their first forays into establishing their independence?

Sleepovers are an important step for 7- to 9-year-olds, Fran Walfish, author of “The Self-Aware Parent,” told Parents magazine.

"If your child likes them, chances are she is growing more comfortable with separation from you," Walfish said.

With the following tips from the magazine, you can increase the chances that your child won’t want to bow out at around bedtime.

Offer to host: Before you OK a sleepover at a friend's house, let your child test the nighttime scenario by inviting her pal to yours. "That way, you'll see if your child grows tired of being with her friend or starts to squabble with her after a couple of hours -- a sign that she may need more social-skills practice before staying over at another family's home," Walfish told Parents.

Talk about what to expect: Getting apprehensive before or even during a sleepover often stems from the unknown. Your child might wonder where he'll sleep, whether it's OK to call you before bed, or if bringing his favorite stuffed animal will make him look like a baby. And you might have some of the same anxieties, too. So before you accept an invitation, find out how the sleepover will unfold and bring up any concerns you have to the hosting parents.

Get your kid on board: Once you are comfortable with the sleepover arrangement, let your child know the key details.
 
Help everyone get along: If you're hosting a sleepover with more than one other child, decide how you're going to handle such situations as who gets to sleep next to the birthday child or play the first round of Just Dance.
 
Know when to fold: If your child is at his first sleepover and wants to come home for a reason that can't be fixed -- "I miss you and I can't fall asleep," or "Their dog is barking and scaring me!" -- it's best just to pick him up rather than try to persuade him to stay. "Doing so establishes the trust that you will come get him if he needs it," Walfish said. "The next day, you can talk about how he felt and what might make it better in the future. But dwelling or over-analyzing will only make him feel like he failed."
 
Trust your gut: Don't feel like a bad parent for declining a sleepover request. “It’s smart to skip one if you think your kid isn't quite ready,” Walfish said. "It's better for kids to have a positive first experience than to risk an embarrassing or upsetting incident that might turn them off altogether."

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Helping around the house: chores for all ages

1/17/2018

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Dusting the dining room table. Washing the windows. Feeding the cat.

Just what chores can your child be trusted to handle? And at what age?

Household chores are important for children to learn, both for their development as individuals and for contributions to the family and home.

But there are appropriate ages for various chores. Although you wouldn’t want your 3-year-old to be in charge of taking care of the family dog, you might want him or her to help you make the bed, and you definitely would want little Aiden or Ava to pick up their toys and put them in a safe area.

Our friends at thespruce.com have published a list of age-appropriate chores; here are some highlights for all parents and caregivers to consider, keeping in mind that all children develop differently:

Ages 2-3: Toddlers love to help with chores. With that in mind, they could: take laundry to the laundry room; dust with socks on their hands; mop in some areas (with help).

Ages 4-5: Preschool-aged kids still are fairly motivated to help around the house. They also love individual time with adults. They also love rewards, which don't have to be huge (think stickers!). Thus, they could: clear and set the table; dust; carry and put away groceries; and help with the cooking and food preparation.

Ages 6-8: Although enthusiasm for chores might diminish for school-aged kids, they have other redeeming qualities that work well for chores. Most school-aged children have an overwhelming desire to be independent. Parents can guide children to become self-sufficient in their chores by using chore charts to keep track of their responsibilities. Noting completed tasks will help motivate children to continue working. Chore suggestions for this age group include vacuuming and mopping; taking out ​the trash; folding and putting away laundry.

Ages 9-12: Kids at this age will appreciate a set schedule and expectations; they don’t like unexpected work. If you create a schedule or system with a little input from them, you should have a smooth transition. Among the possibilities for them: help wash the car; learn to wash dishes; clean the bathroom; rake leaves; operate the washer and dryer.
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Beyond age 12, the spruce.com makes several suggestions, including washing windows and cleaning out the refrigerator. Remember that these chores are intended not to punish your children or force them into being your personal assistant, but to help them develop as people.  

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Snowboarding before walking? Maybe

1/15/2018

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Skiing or snowboarding? And at what age -- 1, 3, 5, 10? Older?

As the winter of 2017-18 reaches the midpoint of its first full month, downhill snow sports are a hot topic -- especially after a video showing a not-quite 1-year-old girl snowboarding in Idaho went viral last month.

There are, of course, many slopes to choose from in the Albany area, from Maple Ski Ridge in Rotterdam to Willard Mountain in Greenwich to Jiminy Peak in Hancock, Mass.

If you’re a parent, though, the bigger question might be what age to start your kids on the slopes rather than where to take them.

Mark Raymond, general manager of Training and Quality for Vail Ski and Snowboard School in mountain-rich Colorado, told vail.com that the rule for his school is that a child must be at least 3 years old and potty-trained to be in a group ski lesson.

“Ideally, everyone would start at age 3,” Raymond said, “because at that age, kids are fearless.” He said a 3-year-old’s small size and adaptability make skiing much easier to learn than for an adult.

Teaching youngsters to ski is about familiarizing them with the equipment and the feeling of gliding on snow, Raymond told vail.com.

But what about snowboarding?

Raymond said most kids have trouble nailing down that sport’s mechanics of standing sideways before age 5. Young children carry gravity in their heads rather than in their core, making snowboarding a wobbly activity, Raymond said.

Regardless of what the experts recommend, it’s up to you, parents, to decide when you think your child has the skills, temperament and determination needed to hit the bunny slopes.

No matter what age you decide on, always make sure your child is wearing his or her helmet.  

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Capturing great kid pictures with your phone? Easy

1/12/2018

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You don’t have to be a professional photographer to take professional-looking photos of your kids.

Whether you’re at a soccer game, on vacation, in your backyard or at the park, the opportunities for sterling, memorable photos are plentiful, especially when you have your iPhone handy.

And we know, parents, that you rarely leave home without yours.

Courtesy of the Red Tricycle website, here are some suggestions for how you can take iPhone pictures of your kids that will dazzle your friends and relatives.

  1. You don’t have to unlock your phone. If your phone is locked, you can just swipe left to pull your camera up. No passcode or touch ID required.
  2. Your phone comes with focus. When you have your camera open, just tap the screen where you want your focus to be (a yellow box will indicate this). Tap it again and it will allow you to adjust the exposure.
  3. It’s easier to lighten a dark photo than to darken a bright photo. If you’re in a situation where the lighting is too low but adding a big overhead light or flash would ruin the photo, opt for darker. You can take a dark photo and lighten it, but once your photo is too light, it’s hard to darken it enough to make it worth keeping.
  4. Don’t go overboard on filters, and put your filter on your phone before you take the photo. The biggest mistake most people make to existing photos is to get carried away with filters. If you want to use a filter, try editing your photos in the Instagram app, where a double-tap on any filter allows you to adjust the amount.
  5. Change the way you hold the phone. Most of us hold it upright and snap pictures, but changing the position of your phone can make a subtle but noticeable difference. For example, flip the phone upside down — you can create different angles this way and still easily reach the photo button to take your picture. Also, crouch, kneel or lie down on your belly to get photos that fill the frame with your child and show the world from his or her point of view. And instead of taking the same picture three times, move around to capture different angles of the same scene. You’ll be amazed at how the light and the mood of the photo changes when you move even a few feet.
And, lastly, parents: Practice, practice, practice. Challenge yourself to take one good picture of your kids each week. Yes, you’ll take a lot of bad photos. But in the age of digital photography, who cares? Delete the ones you don’t like and keep going. You’ll definitely end up with some gems!

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Winter birthday? Try these fun indoor party ideas

1/11/2018

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The fun part about kids having a wintertime birthday: School is in session, so the birthday boys and girls probably are wished a happy birthday on the school loudspeaker in the morning announcements. A star for the day.
The bad news: In the Albany, New York, area, it’s generally cold and snowy, so figuring out how to celebrate gets a little trickier than in the warmer months. Just what kind of party can you throw that takes the elements out of the equation?
There are a number of fun ways that range from little cost to a little more costly, from at home to at a special spot.
To start, there’s always the basic slumber party, an inexpensive event where you invite a small group of your child’s friends to your home on a weekend night. Experts recommend limiting the guest list to five. From there, plan a full evening: food, a movie, cookie decorating, a “spa night” with fun hand creams and nail polish for the girls, maybe video games or knee hockey, if you’ve got the space, for the boys.
For the older kids, who undoubtedly will be bringing a smartphone to the party, set up a fun photo booth with props so they can capture silly pictures with their friends on their phones. It's all about making memories.
Chris Nease, founding editor of the website Celebrations At Home, likes to embrace winter by creating a cozy party with a theme of warming up. One of her favorite ideas, according to care.com, is to set up a tent in the middle of the living room and make s'mores with hot cocoa. She also likes going with a luau theme, complete with leis, hula skirts and coconuts.
If you want to move beyond a house slumber party to celebrate a winter birthday, here are some suggestions from experts via care.com:
  • Hotel slumber party: Want to avoid the cleanup at home? Consider hosting a sleepover in a hotel. Reserve a room at a suite-style hotel where you can find rooms for less than $100. While you’re at it, make it a swimming party. Although it’s cold outside, most suite-style hotels have indoor pools and meeting facilities, perfect for a winter pool party. A parent, of course, will stay with the kids.
  • Lego party: Set up plastic buckets of assorted Legos for kids who like to create their own masterpieces. Create a Lego-themed party with Lego cut-outs, a Lego cake and even play hide-the-Lego games.
  • Top Chef party: A party where kids create their own meal is fun and easy, plus you can adapt this theme to accommodate children of all ages. Make it a pizza party with already prepared dough divided into small balls. Set out bowls of grated cheese, sauce and assorted toppings -- then leave the rest of the work to the kids. Make invitations that look like menus and give everyone their own chef hats, aprons and wooden spoons for party favors.
If you want to get sporty with your indoor winter party, you could try bowling at such places as Spare Time Entertainment in Clifton Park -- for a real challenge, don’t use the bumpers! -- or the trampolines and colorful big slides at Billy Beez at Crossgates Mall in Albany. There’s also soccer, flag football, dodgeball and the Bounce Zone at Afrim’s Sports in Colonie. That’s just for starters. An internet search will lead you to a number of fun, party-ready facilities in our area.
Don’t let the snow and cold be a deterrent to a fun birthday party. Wintertime options abound in the Capital Region!

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Making allowance count: mistakes parents make

1/9/2018

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“Back in my day, I got an allowance of (insert pitiful amount here), and then it increased to (slightly less pitiful amount here) and I felt rich.”

Ahh, the memories we parents share with our kids. (Remember: We’re the same folks who walked uphill to school both ways when we were young.)

Financial allowances are an important family topic because of the importance of money in our society. You know, the money that buys food, shelter, clothing and PlayStation 4 games.

The website MarketWatch references a study by the American Institute of Certified Public Accountants that says approximately 70 percent of parents give their kids an allowance, and the average amount is $67.80 a month.
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But whatever amount parents dole out, they should be aware of these common mistakes, according to MarketWatch:
  • You’re obsessed with how much you’re giving the kids: Parents get hung up on the amount, but the figure matters less than the fact that an allowance is a chance to talk about money and how to manage it.
  • You start giving the allowance too late: Roughly half of parents still aren’t paying by age 8 — and experts say that’s a mistake. One expert recommends doing it “as soon as they grasp the concept — around 5 years old or when they start kindergarten.” Another expert says “as soon as they can count money,” which is about age 4 or 5. This way, money — and an appreciation for things like saving it and what it is used for — become a part of their lives very early.
  • You pay your differently to your daughter: While nearly two in three men say they got an allowance growing up, only about half of women say the same, and experts say they still sometimes see this approach. Experts agree that boys and girls should be treated equally.
  • You disperse the money with no strings attached: You should make your kids save at least part of the allowance they’re given. The recommended amount: one-third each week.
  • You tie all the money to chores: Most parents make their kids work for their allowance by doing an average of six hours of chores per week, according to the AICPA survey. But at least one expert disagrees, saying “kids should do chores and take on household responsibilities because they are part of the family, and being part of the family means contributing. They are not being paid to contribute — it is expected as part of their family role.” Another expert says that if you peg an allowance to chores, kids will simply stop doing them once they have enough money.
 
 

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Oh, those chapped winter hands

1/8/2018

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Oh, those dry, chapped, cracked ― and sometimes painful ― hands.

You shouldn’t have to go through tubes of ointments and boxes of Band-Aids to get rid of one of the downsides of winter for you and your kids.

The Children’s Hospital of Orange County, Calif., reminds us that when the outside temperatures drop, the wind increases and the house heater gets cranked up, dry and cracked hands are an unfortunate and common side effect.

“The cold air is more drying and wind is also more drying. And then add forced-air heating, and that will dry skin out even more,” CHOC pediatrician Dr. Angela Dangvu said on the hospital’s website.

Although parents can’t control the weather, they can take the following steps to help protect their child’s hands against dryness, according to CHOC:

Choose soap carefully: Start by using a moisturizing hand soap. Frequent hand washing, which is crucial during the winter season to avoid colds and other viruses, worsens the problem by further dehydrating the skin, Dr. Dangvu says. Look for soaps that more resemble a lotion than a traditional soap and have words like “moisturizing” or “conditioning” on the label. Avoid antibacterial or deodorant soaps. Also, hand sanitizer gel is an effective way to clean hands that is less drying than a soap-and-water method. However, children with the onset of dry skin should avoid gel, because its alcohol content can sting.

Creams, not lotions: As a preventative measure, parents can apply moisturizer to their child’s hands after hand-washing or bath time. Look for products described as creams rather than as lotions. These are richer and have more staying power than thinner products such as baby lotions.
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A three-step approach: If a child’s hands still become dry, Dr. Dangvu recommends the following three steps.
  • Start by regularly applying cream to the hands.
  • If dryness doesn’t improve after a few days, move on to a petroleum-based ointment. Parents can intensify the therapy by applying ointment to hands before bed, and asking children to wear cotton gloves or even socks over their hands to lock in moisture while they sleep.
  • If the condition doesn’t change after a few more days, parents can try an over-the-counter hydrocortisone cream.
If these steps don’t improve your child’s chapped hands, you should take him or her to your pediatrician to rule out a bacterial infection or other condition, Dr. Dangvu says.

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The family that exercises together...stays healthy together!

1/3/2018

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Now that the holidays are over, it’s time for parents ― and kids ― to resume a healthy lifestyle together.
That means … exercising!

During the winter in the Albany area, that can encompass everything from walks to housework, while in the summer, the exercise can be stretched to bigger energy burners, including participatory sports such as softball, basketball, swimming and tennis.

We accept no excuses for no exercise, parents. Partaking makes us feel better ― it sparks the release of uplifting chemicals called endorphins ― and it also helps control our weight.

Adelphi University professor Stephen Virgilio, author of the book “Active Start for Healthy Kids,” told Parents magazine that “it’s never too early to start" exercising.

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention recommends that children and adolescents get one hour or more of physical activity each day, and that adults get at least 2½ hours a week.
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With those goals in mind, here are some family activity suggestions from Parents magazine:
  • Pre- or post-dinner walks: Whether you head into town or just cruise the neighborhood, building a walk into your daily schedule ensures it won't get put off. Too cold to walk outside? Walking the stairs in your house, up and down,  and then again, is a cardio workout.
  • Crank up the music and boogie down: Betsy Murphy of Coral Gables, Fla., holds disco nights with her four kids and several neighbors. She moves the furniture aside, fills the CD player with dance tunes, and lets the kids take turns using a flashlight as a strobe light. "They dance for three hours straight," Murphy said.
  • Make a game out of household chores: Pretend that dust creatures are invading earth and it's up to Captain [insert child's name] to save the day by capturing them with his broom. Says registered dietitian Juliet Zuercher of Arizona: "Make believe he's one of the Rescue Heroes, and have him save his teddy bears from the slimy pit of the floor by putting them safely in his toy chest."
  • Sneak workouts into other activities: If you have a toddler, have him or her walk on brief errands with you instead of riding in the stroller. That will allow you to take the stairs instead of the elevator, where needed.
  • Turn TV commercials into fitness breaks: Invent silly names for simple exercises such as squats, push-ups and sit-ups, and then do them together until your show comes back on. ​
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